“Forgive us our tresspasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”

“Because we have been forgiven, we know the way of forgiveness.”

When Jesus answered the Apostles’ plea by giving them the Lord’s prayer, He did not emphasize that we should love one another, but rather that we should forgive one another. I sometimes feel that many of us suffer from hidden anger, painful memories of slights, and worse, persecution that we can will to forgive.  It seems to be a cultural trend today that there is always somebody to blame.  If we are completely at a loss, there is always genetics and our parents!

It may well be true that each of us is wounded, but dwelling on the wounds and the scars and the hurt and the mutilations takes us straight back to self and away from God. What has happened to you and whose fault it is , is not really your affair. It is for you to ask God for the grace of a blanket forgiveness, forgiving without even knowing in what way you were damaged. If we cannot drop the desire to be justified, we are shutting ourselves off from God. Remember always this is not a matter of how you feel! Emotionally, you may be scarred forever by some betrayal, you may be unable to forget it. With all your heart, though, you cling to God and pray to forgive it.

Let me repeat, it is the will to forgive that matter. After all, God alone knows how deliberate or “evil” this betrayal was: have we not quite innocently in our own time damaged other people?  The whole roiling mass of our pains and suspicions are antipathetic to the surrender to God that we desire in prayer.  We choose Him, we choose to forgive as our Father in heaven forgives; and we trust Him to transform us into men and women who truly love.

About the feelings of hurt of betrayal we can do nothing. Or, rather, we can offer them actively and consciously to God. The more we pray, the more we become aware of our own need for forgiveness. Yet God, freely offering His forgiveness, is all too aware that we cannot accept its blessing if we still harbor rancor against others in our hearts. In a sense, one of the reasons why we offer ourselves in prayer is to be forgiven, brought nearer the holiness of God and enabled by His grace to draw others into forgiveness.

Sr. Wendy Beckett

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